MODULE 4
Practicing Courageous conversations - Deploy Yourself
Stakeholder: Opposed Parents
1. Role Setting Identify a role that engages the other person in the conversation. The role you choose may be different than how you normally interact with the other person. What role (not position) are you playing? Examples: colleague, friend, authority figure, confidant.
Role: Teacher (Figure of Authority) / Friend
2. Confronting Conflict Make a statement in order to surface the conflict. Given how you understand the adaptive challenge, what might be the main issue in conflict? The intention is to put the conflict on the table, and explain to the other person what the disagreement is most likely about.
"You are probably not very comfortable with sending the child for the extra class."
Questions
1. Why are you not comfortable with sending your child for the extra class? (Safety, other Tuition, Travel)
2. What are your aspirations for the child?
3. Why did you choose to get your child educated?
4. Adaptive Ask Based on your understanding of what it takes to mobilize change with the other person, it’s time to make an ask. What are you asking the other person to do, and what are you in turn willing to change? It is the fact of your risk-taking that maximizes the chances of preserving the relationship while dealing with the difficult issue.
Ask
"This is an opportunity for your child to get up to speed with respect to Math and English. It is free of cost and only 45 minutes 4 days a week. I request you think about the benefits for the child and how it can directly impact his/ her education. We can definitely find alternate ways of addressing any logistical concerns you may have. In fact I am willing to organize something close to the community to make this happen."
Stakeholder: Opposed Students
1. Role Setting Identify a role that engages the other person in the conversation. The role you choose may be different than how you normally interact with the other person. What role (not position) are you playing? Examples: colleague, friend, authority figure, confidant.
Role: Teacher (Figure of Authority) / Friend
2. Confronting Conflict Make a statement in order to surface the conflict. Given how you understand the adaptive challenge, what might be the main issue in conflict? The intention is to put the conflict on the table, and explain to the other person what the disagreement is most likely about.
"You are probably not able to find the time to come for the extra time or looking at other ways of spending that time ."
Questions
1. Why are you not coming for the extra class? (Safety, lack of friend in the extra classes, other Tuition, Travel, compromise on play)
2. What are your aspirations?
3. Do you feel these Extra classes could add value to you?
4. Do you want to reach the same level as other students because I feel you can?
5. Are there other things you prefer doing in the same time?
6. Have you made a goal for yourself? If yes, how are you looking to achieve it?
4. Adaptive Ask Based on your understanding of what it takes to mobilize change with the other person, it’s time to make an ask. What are you asking the other person to do, and what are you in turn willing to change? It is the fact of your risk-taking that maximizes the chances of preserving the relationship while dealing with the difficult issue.
Ask
"This is an opportunity for you to get up to speed with other students in Math and English. It is short and less demanding in terms of time yet promises to deliver high results. I request you think about the benefits for the you and how it can directly impact your education. We can definitely find alternate ways of addressing any logistical concerns you may have. In fact I am willing to organize something close to the community to make this happen."
